Balancing Motherhood and Writing: Crafting My New Series and Sharing Some Helpful Tips
Navigating the complexities of indie publishing while being a mom to two wonderful young children has taught me a few tricks on managing time and creativity effectively. Today, I want to share some of these insights, hoping they might help those of you embarking on your first writing project, or anyone looking for a nudge to balance writing with parenting.
Embracing the Unplanned Journey: Character Development for Pantsers
As authors who write by the seat of our pants, affectionately known as "pantsers," the journey of crafting a story is as unpredictable as it is thrilling. Character development, a cornerstone of compelling narrative, can seem daunting without a detailed plan. Yet, it's in the spontaneous flow of creation that some of the most authentic and dynamic characters come to life.
Your Best Year
I recently discovered Mel Robbins on Tik Tok. One of her videos came up on my fyp and she was inspiring - so much so that I watched a YouTube video today of her podcast that is over an hour long. In the video she shares the 6 questions that her and her family answer at the end of each year.
I sat down today and answered those same 6 questions.
Some of my Favorite Books
I consistently read a book a day, because once I start a book I have to know what happens. I’m a serial, binge reader. I’ve read so many incredible books recently…
My 2023 Goals
I’m writing this in August, so keep that in mind. I’ve got some big goals to fulfill in four short months. My main goal and priority is getting the Grand Mesa Men series published. I'd honestly be thrilled to have this series out by January 2024 so that's what I'm aiming for. The Grand Mesa Men series has been a long time coming. I am so in love with Jesse and his sons and the female leads in this series are some of my favorite women I’ve ever written.
Audiobooks
It’s only been about two years since I started listening to audiobooks. I never tried before because I didn’t think I’d like it. It’s nice to be able to clean while listening to a book, or continue my book while I’m driving. The narrators make all the difference when it comes to a great audiobook. I have listened to a lot of my favorite books after reading them just to get the audio experience.
Tropes I’d Rather Not Read
Before diving into this, I want to say that this is in no way a jab at you if you love reading these types of books. Reading is subjective! My opinion really means nothing beyond my own preferences. If you love these tropes, keep on loving them. It’s also not set in stone. Maybe one day I will read a book with one of these tropes and fall in love with it. Heck, I might even write a book with one of these elements in it.
Tropes I Love
Before jumping into this, I want to say that just because I adore these tropes doesn’t mean you have to. If you hate these tropes, it’s all good. Reading is subjective! My opinion really means nothing beyond my own preferences. If you love these tropes, please bring on all of the recommendations!
Writing Resources
You can go down the resources rabbit hole forever when it comes to writing. There are a lot of things offered that you don’t need or that won’t work for you. There are also a lot of things that come in handy. Something that works great for you may not work for me and vice versa. However, if you’re a beginner and looking for a place to start, here are some resources that have helped me a lot.
My ‘Me’ Year
When I turned 30, something inside me shifted. It was as if a switch had flipped, and I suddenly realized that I had been living about the last two years of my life on autopilot, constantly saying yes to things I didn't want to do, and allowing others to dictate how I spent my time. I knew it was time for a change – a year of focusing on myself, my passions, and my well-being. If I didn’t change something, I was going to lose myself completely.
Exploring the Pros & Cons of Self-Publishing
Self-publishing provides unmatched freedom and autonomy, allowing you to shape your author journey as you see fit. However, this freedom comes with a flipside: the need for accountability. As a self-published author, you must set and meet your own deadlines, manage your budget, and stay motivated throughout the publishing process. Building a dedicated writing routine and staying committed to your goals are essential aspects of maintaining accountability.
Healing Through Words: Write What You Know
When you use memories from your life in your writing, the process can be profoundly healing. Memories are the threads that weave the tapestry of our lives. They are the repository of our joys, sorrows, victories, and defeats. Memories are not static; they evolve and shape-shift with time. When we revisit our memories through writing, we embark on a journey of self-discovery and healing.
My Brief Thoughts On AI
I am all about working smarter, haha. I don’t shy away from tools that can help me. I know the big argument is whether or not this is “writing” but the ideas are still mine. Similarly, when I use talk to text - the ideas are still mine. If I’m not typing them, are they somehow “less?” No, that’s silly. I won’t lie, I am still on the fence about books that are entirely AI generated. But, I think if it’s known then it’s okay. I’d only feel wrong about it if it was hidden from readers.
Writing Postpartum
Taking a planned break while still focusing on how/when to best move forward is completely different than dropping everything with no intention of pulling yourself out of that dark hole. For me it wasn’t just being busy with my son and a new baby. It was the inability to write. It was my lack of inspiration and will. I didn’t want to. During that time, my love of writing was hibernating. Those of you that have had children may know what I mean when I say one day I “woke up” and the year before felt like a dream.
My Reading Preferences
I am always wary about posting my opinions on books. I am an author, so I know how much criticism of something you truly love can hurt. I do think it’s important to note that reading is subjective. Some people will love your book and others might describe it as the worst thing they’ve ever read. There’s no real right or wrong. There are just opinions, what you like, and what you don’t.
Things I Love to have while Writing
I can write in almost any environment. I’ve gotten used to having to write with noise because I have two young children. I write a lot on the road because my husband and I take frequent road trips. I’ve trained myself to be able to tune out everything around me and write. Right now my son is watching a National Geographic show on sharks and I’m standing at my kitchen counter writing this. The fact that I am a person who doesn’t need quiet to write has helped me tremendously. Even though I don’t need peace and quiet, there are a few other things I really enjoy having when I write.
What I’ve Learned (So far)
The absolute biggest lesson I've learned so far on this journey is that you have to go at your own pace. It's so easy to get caught up in comparing yourself to others, and it will drive you nuts.
My writing journey as a wife, as a mother of two, as a person with a full-time job, as a person running a home with 45 animals, is going to look different than someone who is single, someone without kids, someone who is already a full-time author, and so on.
That's okay.